Sunday, January 1, 2012

FEELING LOST

Never settle for being someone's "other" when you have the potential to be someone's "only".

     I once wished to the man I love was that, he will tell straight to me that the love he feel towards me is "true love" not by chance that we have each other, but our choice. 

     And what I learned is that, each day should be spent finding beauty in flowers and poetry. That a day spent with dreaming and sunsets and refreshing breezes cannot be bettered. But most of all, I learned that life is about sitting on benches next to ancient creeks with my hand on his hand and sometimes, on good days, for falling in love.

     Being beautiful is far more than how many boys you can get to look at you, or how much make-up you can wear. It's about what you live for, it's about what defines you, it's about the heart that you have and what makes you special. It's about those little quirks that makes you, you. It's about going against the flow and living out what you honestly think. And that I think, what makes us beautiful.

       His brown eyes met mine and we didn't look away. For a moment caught in this awkward staring glance and then he did the most amazing thing when he looked away..he smiled. It's the possibility that keeps us going, not the guarantee. 
Ladies?
      Do you ever just sit there and wonder why he chose you? Do you ever stop and think that it was just to good to be true? Does it ever seem like you're afraid to lose him, because without him your whole life will be ruined?

Failing is the first step to success, crying is the first step to happiness. And heart break is the first step to true love.
Gentlemen?
       I think one of the worst feelings in the world, right behind heart break, is that disgustingly empty feeling you get, right after you spill your heart out and lay all your cards on the table. Right after you get the courage to say everything you have been feeling and be completely and recklessly honest. It's that feeling you get right after you risk everything, and he just walks away. Right? Because then, you realize that you just lost. You lost everything you didn't even know you
had when you said "what do i have to lose?" Then one day when it's way too late you're going to say, "I love you." Then when she don't reply you're going to muster up everything you have and ask, "Do you love me?" and you know what she's going to say, "I used to love you, I wish I still did, but you were with all those other girls, and you were way too blind to see what was rignt in front of you the whole time. I've dropped you hints, and I've tried to make it clear, but you never caught on. So right now I'm going to have to say, we're just friends, like you did to me all those times." (my experienced)

      That guy want me to prove that I really love him, but the only proof I can give to him is I held on to him even though he didn't care anymore, I've waited even though he weren't coming, I loved him for so long even though he didn't notice. Because he was then seriously mad selfish for the whole time.

He said: "I didn't mean to break your heart," but before he could finish,
I replied while crying: "I didn't mean to fall in love either, but we all make mistakes." And if you see me walking with someone else it’s not because I love them, it’s because you weren’t there to walk with me. If I fall in love with someone else, it’s not because I wanted to, but because you weren’t there to catch me. It's sorta like I gave you the key to my heart and you lost it. And I kept making copies because I wanted to let you in. But unfortunately no matter how I effort to make copies, I can't make the same shape and color anymore. 

        Everyone has that relationship that they never quite get over. No matter what happens in between, when you're together it's like nothing has changed. Deep down, you both know you're supposed to be together, but you just can't seem to make it work. There are people who make things happen, there are people who watch things happen, and there are people who wonder what happened. To be successful, we need to be that "person" who makes things happen. Too often we don't realize what we have until it's gone, too often we're to stubborn to say 'sorry, i was wrong' too often it seems we hurt the one's closest to our hearts and we let the most foolish things tear us apart. Agree?

Move on. It's just a chapter in the past, but don't close the book just turn the page.
(but I can't seem to move on!)

I thought you were the most amazing boy ever. If I could have any guy in the world, I would have picked you above all the others, I thought you were different, I was wrong. Your just another guy to me now.(and I need to fvcking let you go and forget you now! I know I can!)

They say the little things in life matter the most, but your a big part of me and you matter the most.

Time is money and you ain't worth a fucking dime!
For all the lies I've tasted, just looking for the truth. For all the dreams I'm chasing, well what am I to do. When everything's against me, and the answers are all wrong; I'm hoping that I find out it was worth it all along.